The funeral I was looking forward to

The funeral I was looking forward to

There was a lot of chatter about what our friend’s funeral would be like since he planned it himself. I think people expected it to be Lucky Chang’s meets Barnum and Bailey but it wasn’t like that at all. When he was alive he loved beautiful, lavish things but would never spend a lot of money on them. He hunted for his treasures at auctions and estate sales. As outrageous as he was there was a traditional, practical and thrifty side to him. His funeral choices made sense.

There was no viewing. He was cremated before the church service and his ashes were inside a black marble urn sitting on a table next to a single rose. The church was not his own church but I’m sure he chose it for its appearance and location. It wasn’t in the best part of town, but it was ornate, architecturally outstanding and rich in history. It was filled with gold embellishment, stained glass windows, burning candles and religious relics. He chose the priest, readings and music. He selected the soloist and she sang “Ava Maria”. It lasted for 45 minutes. It represented him perfectly.

More than 25 people drove over an hour and a half with less than 24 hours notice to be there to honor him. That says a lot. Sadly, I don’t think his partner of more than 20 years received the acknowledgement he deserved. While he sat in the front pew with the family, there was no mention of him in the obituary and he stood with the rest of the guests instead of taking his place in the receiving line. That was the only thing that didn’t feel right to me…